Dear Diary..

Time to blog again. Head got too many things already. Time to let go. Can't find the right person to talk. So have to blog. If my ex is still with me i can share anything and everything with her in my room or even outside alone. Miss having a girl by my side who will really listened to what i say. Even though i have a new gf. But she's always outside with her friends. Her friends always has all her time. Everytime i wanted to meet her she always reject me over and over again. Till i'm lost all my courage to ask her anymore. I'll just wait for her to ask me out. I shall keep quiet le. 也許她還年輕啦. But i have gone thru what she is going true. But she never listen to me. Maybe this is the karma that i get. Last time my ex always be there for me thru thick and thin. Never leave me at all. Is i don't know how to cherish her. So i hope the next guy who are with her will treat her 100times better then i do. 对我来说，钱不是万能. I can always earn that money back. But is the love and trust. I care more for love and trusts. Once both is broken its broken. You can never mend it back. Yes you can but the scars will always be there no matter what. I hope you will learn it one day.

baby dont let go
;6:56 PM

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Dear Diary..

Maybe i'm with you for just a few weeks. But the way you treat me is like you never give a damn about me like that. I always make time for you. Try to go down and meet you whenever i'm free. But you? Always say you can't lar. This lar that lar. I don't mind one or twice you said you can't. But everytime you wanna meet me in the end is? You cannot make it. You need meet this person. You wanna spend time with them. Then you say i never trust you enough. 我现在还在努力，等我有一天真的不想再去争取了。我告诉你，我真的是放弃了。不想再为这份爱情奋斗了。我累了，我没告诉你是因为我还想和你走下去，可是你一直没把我放在心里，在有实力的人也会放弃的。

baby dont let go
;10:20 PM

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Dear Diary..

Today is Christmas and i have lost 3 of the most important people in my life. It sucks but i know we cannot turn back time. Have to look forward. Looking back at our past Christmas celebration there's always 16 of us. But now we have with 13 people. Still feeling heart broken for losing shermaine. Really sad. We've been thru thick and thin together but still god decided to break us up. Look at the family pic. Its not even full. Still short of papa, ah gong, my beloved Shermaine. I'm not even happy at all when i was there. I think about the past where there's 16 people. Its was more fun then. But now i will never find this kind of fun anymore. Hais. Always thinking of Shermaine. 失去了才懂得珍惜. Really regret letting her go. I should have hold her back. Now then start to treasure her. Its kinda sad knowing that she have deleted me completely from her life. I will never know how is she doing again. There's something missing in my heart. I wonder isit you. Loving you was always my priority. But treasuring you was not there. I use to treat you like shit but now after you gone then i know actually you are the one and only for me. But i will never find back this feelings. I have no idea how and why i'm feeling like that. Maybe i have already treat you as my wife thats why i'm feeling this way. I really hope you will find a better guy then me. Who will treat you 100times better then i do. Having a relationship with you was never wrong. If you ever come and find me late at night. I promise you i will always open the door for you. Comfort you when you need. 

baby dont let go
;8:34 PM

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Dear Diary..

Hello ah gong!! How are you? Miss the days you come my house every week to play com and eat with us!! I miss you alot!! Sorry for making you angry once! Cause of that you hit me! Sorry ah gong!! I really miss you!! Hope time cn turn back! Miss the times we are at Thailand! Everyday in Thailand is the best! Hope ah gong you are at the other world you are happy!! You cn go find papa if you wan! My friend's mother say you and papa are very good! Everytime drink beer together! Isit because of that you go find papa? Ah ma very sad just that she never show! Nw jiejie as and when she will go pei ah ma and this coming 8oct is your 49days liao! Remember come back eat and recieved your clothes okay! If you need anything you cn come and tell me de! I'm not scared one so dun worry okay ah gong! You must blessed ah ma make sure she is healthy!! This pic is the last time you come my house and celebrate mama birthday! This is also your last family photo together! Everybody was smiling so happy! So ah gong i hope you will be happy at the other world okay!! Miss you always! Best ah gong in the world!!

baby dont let go
;2:59 AM

Dear Diary..

Pa! How are you? It has been 92days since you have left us! I'm still sad about it! You are the only one who know how i feel and the one who will listen to what i say! I'm sorry for making you angry at times and also miss the food you cook for us! Pa if i have a chance to make you come back! I promise you i will be the best son you have and everything i do i will think of you! I know you are very proud of me for doing the SAF50 parade and i also know you tell gugu they all you very happy! Pa will you come back and visit us if you can anot? I really miss you alot! I'm sorry for making you angry at times. I miss you alot! Looking back the picture you enjoy with us at Thailand! I really miss those times! I wanted to bring you to different countries but nw i cannot do anything about it! I hope you will go to the places you always wanted to go! Pa this is the last family photo we took together this year! And you really enjoy the cake i buy for mummy! And also the cake i buy for you during your birthday! I know you like this cake! But you find it expensive but nw i wan to buy cake for you also no more chance already! Pa i really hope you are happy at the other world! Ah ma ah gong er gu and li peh will pei you! I will always love you papa! When i save enough money i will put you at gong ming shan let you stay at aircon room and stay at high floor! I cannot sleep because i think of you and ah gong alot! Still remember you go cut hair and take pic at amk hub yourself cause you wanted your passport to look very nice! It was a very nice picture taken! Pa i really really miss you alot! I will take care of mama and baby for you de! I will make sure they are good! Dun worry okay papa! 

baby dont let go
;1:57 AM

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Dear Diary..

Haix cn anyone tell me wad to do??
Like 2 person at 1 time..
This feeling jux suck how i wish there is someone to tell me wad i should do..
Wth is wrong wit me and i seriously feel like endin my life man..
Haix sad sad sad..
Feel so weak...
Sob sob T.T
haix maybe im rite nt to find anymore stead...
This will be better..
I will always be te one hurting thm like fk like tat..
I hate to see gals cry...
Bt wad cn i do???
Haix is past 2 and im still awake.
Wtf man..
Haix shall leave blog nw..
Byeee

baby dont let go
;2:28 AM

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Dear Diary..

Wa sibei long bo blog le...
Haha..
No time blog coz wanna study and tat time work..
Nw at my cousin house so cn blog..
Exam tiscoming friday...
sibei fast sia..
Scared retain siol...
Aiya dun care lar retain retain lor...
I also nvm de...
Wad to do stupid mah so retain lor...
Aiya dun care so much..
Nth to post sia...
Nth much happened...
Gtg le lar..
Bye post

baby dont let go
;11:38 AM

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